Where do you want to Park?

Such an innocent question. Yet one that brings terror to many. The mere thought of vague directions to some mystical spot is enough to make some adults quiver with fear. Obviously, there are those amongst us who drive into a camp turn off the motorhome, and they are there. Then there are the others, many others. Who have either themselves or a partner intent on getting the perceived best possible space.

There are many reasons for choosing the desired parking spot, and none of them is probably what you are thinking. If you are the other party in the motorhome. Then opening your mouth to express your thoughts is perhaps better suited to stuffing your foot inside. Just sit there and take directions and do as you are told. Or get out there and direct the driver as you are meant to. Of course, first, you have to understand where you are being directed to.

So many times, we have been sitting peacefully minding our own business. When the day is interrupted by the amusement provided by arriving campers. The hilarity of some efforts is only topped by another camper arriving and making an even bigger hash of things. You watch as vague directions such as “over there by that hedge”, or just back into “that” spot. Leave the driver wholly flummoxed.

In my case because I suffer from dyslexia, instructions are complete double dutch. With myself often finding I have no idea what or where Sarah is talking about. In some ways this blog is inspired by some of our parking events but also watching others.

I have thought about all the different sorts of people you meet at various different camping grounds. I think I have nailed down most of the different parking personalities. But I am sure some of you have experienced many others.

The Dumper: These to me are the ones who just arrive and “dump” their motorhome or caravan wherever they can find a space. They are just happy to be there and don’t have the parking concerns apparent in many of the rest of us. Some of these also tend to be the ones who once parked proceed to dump the contents of their lockers all around the van. This then allows their claimed space to grow well beyond what some would consider reasonable.

The Leveller: No matter where they park, even if they were on a bowling green they would be out with the spirit level and the chocks ensuring that there wasn’t a millimetre of difference between the front and rear or side to side. This group also probably are part of the Measurer’s below.

The Measurer: Following the NZMCA 3 metre rules to the extreme these people can be seen pacing out the distance between their van and the next no matter where they have parked. Only to leave just enough space for a backpacker to sneak between the two vehicles. These are also the same ones who at an NZMCA Park with marked spaces will be out with a measure ensuring they are in the middle of the space.

The Mover: Never quite satisfied with the spot they have chosen, these are the ones that jump into a newly vacant spot when someone leaves the camp. This also usually happens just as you are arriving yourself. As they dash to the other spot with their chairs to claim it before you do. All this, despite there being no noticeable difference between the two spots.

The TV Addict: No sooner have they set up their motorhome when you see the TV aerial going up only for them to discover that they have parked too close to the tree and need to move again.

The Solar King: A variation on the TV addict, these people end up moving their vans due to the fact that they can get an extra 30 minutes solar charge by moving out of the shadow.

The Next Door Neighbour: No matter how much space there is in the camping ground they choose to park not only right next to you. But close enough that you can hear them snoring despite wearing earplugs. The worst part about these people is that often despite parking so close they completely ignore you when spoken too.

The Loner: Self-explanatory, but this motorhomer who is the opposite of the next-door neighbour choosing to park as far away from you as they possibly can. Absolutely guaranteed not to join you for happy hour. At this point, you are checking under your arms for BO or something else unsavoury.

The Newbie: Most noticeable amongst caravanners. Those who have a great deal of difficulty backing their caravan or motorhome into the desired space. We once watched a couple almost get divorced right there in the camp. On what was obviously the first time trying to park a caravan.

The In-Charge, Know It all: These are the most hated of all people in the campground. Who despite having no authority, take it upon themselves to direct you into a spot. Or tell you which way you should be parking. Or who you should look out for in the camp. These people bristle with indignation when their advice is ignored. You are then treated as a complete outsider who is no longer welcome in “my” camp.

The idea of this blog wasn’t to go into the various personalities of people once they have set up camp. Of which there are far too many to list here in this short blog. The idea was to provide you with a small laugh and maybe make you self conscious next time you are parking somewhere. Please feel free to comment here or on Facebook about others that you have met in your travels.

We will be watching you 👀 

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Lending Crowd 1

4 thoughts on “Where do you want to Park?

  1. This made me laugh cos we are a combination of 2 with a new one to add..the ‘lollipop lady’ Parker. We are the ‘TV addict’ and the ‘Mover’ as well..sometimes because the TV has no reception…but that depends on the night of the week. We sometimes move cos of a sunnier spot for happy hour or because the night before we thought we were in a boat the wind rocked us around so much so it’s often to find a more sheltered spot…then the tele doesn’t go! Lol. I’m usually responsible for directing my MM into the spot. I have thought of painting 2 ping pong bats yellow with red lettering on one bat ‘ST’ on one side and ‘OP’ on the other for this purpose as often, even tho I can see him in the mirror, for some weird reason he can’t see me. I do have to tell him to stop prob 2 seconds before he needs too as well cos the message often takes that long to reach the cab, followed by loud bashing on the side of the van shouting ‘STOP’. Then it’s a discussion on the perils of being partially deaf and why he didn’t hear me. Usually by the 3rd camping spot we have it sorted. Launching our boat back in the day had similar problems hence we often find it very entertaining parking ourselves on the beach near the boat ramp for entertainment at the expense of others now. You now have me inspired to go out to the shed and look for those bats…lol

  2. Having been NZMCA members for around 27 years now, we pretty much know what aspect we want for our site, the moment we drive up to the entrance of our destination. We always prefer to park facing south which prevents our solar panels from getting shaded from our satellite dish which is more rearward on the roof. As long as the site is reasonably level and doesn’t have nearby trees likely to cut our satellite signal, choosing a site is reasonably quick for us. We simply just check to see which direction other dishes are facing on arrival to give us immediate indication of our compass bearings. Facing south in the summer, also stops the cab area from getting overheated from direct sunlight. A very amusing blog, I must say.

  3. lol that is so funny, but now you have said it you can sure see all these situations going on around you…. get out there be friendly and met others, this is all meant to be fun.

  4. What a great blog subject, I will be labeling fellow parkers now, such fun. I’m not sure which category I put myself in. When the parking area allows, I must have a view for my cup of tea and gingernut first thing in the morning. Seems to be when I’m sitting in the drivers seat, I can’t figure out which way around I should park to see the view out my side window from my east west bed. AND I’m in a bus, the view is only out the side windows so I like to park side on, and I’ve read many comments about motorhomes who in considerately park this way. Parking is the most stressful.

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